When in July

There’s always something in July. Something memorable. Unforgettable. Special. Life changing.

I am not sure when this trend started but when I recollect the recent years, July serves a flavorful mix of ingredients that impacted my life so much. Some tasted honey. Some tasted bitter.

I started my first job one July morning. Then I made the decision to resign two Julys later. Moved to CCF one Sunday in July. Got baptized on that same July. First NB in July where I met my today’s closest friends. Heart was broken July last year.

And a few years back when I intentionally, and severely dishonored the Lord by disobeying his word. I chose to follow men and not Jesus. It was also in July when I traded him for a cheap bowl of soup. I hope I could turn back the hands of the clock on that season of my life to tell my young self, run, run from them. But there’s no way I could change the past. I reaped ugly consequences.

Seeing this pattern, I was feeling both excited and nervous even before this month has started. It was crazy to tame myself to chill when deep inside I was really expecting and looking forward for something. Yet I tried to lean more towards not manipulating because I also would not want things to happen for pattern’s sake.

Then the magic happened. Today. July 9, 2017. I consider this as the best thing yet. Don’t be overly excited because you might get disappointed. I did not get any career promotion, a boyfriend, won a house and lot, or any of that sort etc. It’s better than those.

It’s something inside. Like I was filled up with a different kind of peace and power.

I might sound crazy right now and why am I even telling about this? But only because my heart is so full and I want not to forget.

To explain in more detail, earlier in church, the message which was all about sexual immorality and idolatry just pierced through my heart. God has been speaking about this in my recent quiet times and the message earlier capped off everything.

In the end, the speaker prayed for us who already accepted Jesus before yet was still not surrendering all. I was moved because it felt like the first time of accepting Jesus as my personal Lord and Saviour. It was renewing. I felt so pure not by my own doing but because of the extravagant love of the Lord to send Jesus to die at the cross, and his promise that the Spirit is now living in me. My faith on God’s future grace never felt so available. That I have the power to flee and say no to disobedience to God.
I was moved because the speaker keeps on repeating to remember this day.

It’s a July. My tears wouldn’t stop. Everything flashed back. Every wrong decisions in July. They greatly impacted my life.

Yet I was moved by God’s love. Because on the place where I was unfaithful, there he came and rescued me.

Now I understand why I can’t remember when I first accepted Jesus. It’s because he set apart this day for that, July 9, 2017 .

And the magic in July continues.

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